I was recently on vacation in Italy and while traveling I had a realization that I believe is relevant to the work we’re all involved in here.
Let me explain… While on my adventure, I noticed a tendency of mine to look at things a distance away from me, and think to myself, I’m going to have to get over to that spot so that I can really appreciate the glorious architecture or natural beauty of the building or area.
So, I’d walk up the hillside, or the steep steps to get to the desired location. Funny thing is, once I was there, the perspective was entirely different. I could no longer see the expansive, all-encompassing, truly awesome scale of the space, building or area, because at that point, I was so close, I only had a very limited, myopic impression.
Of course, it’s true that this view is also amazing… I did want to see the gorgeous church details, architecture, and view from the top of Mt. Vesuvius, up close and personal. But I have to admit that many times the real magnificence, expansive panoramic scene was the most glorious one of all.
All that I hope to convey with this reflection is this: When we are IN the middle of divorce, just like when you are right at the perimeter of Mt. Vesuvius, you are so close to the situation or scene, that it is next to impossible to have real perspective about your divorce or the volcano. Up that close you are unable to take the wider, broader, more expansive view… you cannot see the whole picture of how divorce will eventually fit into your life as a chapter, or a few pages of a chapter, but certainly not as your whole story.
Perspective matters… Your life is expansive, magnificent, brilliant… divorce is part of it. Yes, a small and painful part, but still only a small part of your beautiful life story… A part that one day, you will leave trailing behind you, as you head off into the sunset, catching a glimpse of it as you look into your rearview window, and wave it good-bye!!