Looking for a cure for the Summertime Blues
Summertime can be one of the toughest seasons when you’re going through divorce. The stark reality that the summer vacations and getaways of the past are over and done can be very difficult to accept.
One thing that may prove helpful is to have strategies in place that protect you (at least in part) from the inevitable rough spots that are going to occur along the way.
Take time to proactively get your plans in place for upcoming holidays or important days in your life. Make sure to cushion yourself so that you’re not feeling isolated or cut off from friends or loved ones during this time.
Contact a friend and be honest about how hard the summer is for you. Allow yourself to be vulnerable and accept help and consolation. If invited to a neighbor’s backyard party, accept the invite. If physical activity rejuvenates you, schedule a long bike ride to a new and exciting spot. Plan a vacation with a brother or sister or reconnect with cousins, classmates, or old friends for a reunion. Put yourself out there by joining meet-up groups who hike, bike or travel. Plan an outing to a park, museum, or ball game with co-workers or friends. If all else fails, volunteer or lend a hand at a charity or nonprofit. (Last year, I volunteered on Thanksgiving in Philadelphia. I did dishes at the Philly House while other volunteers were serving dinner. What a feel-good decision that was… Totally shifted my awareness!)
The point is, you can now design summers, holidays, and birthdays, and decide how they will look as you transition into this next stage of life. It’s not going to completely eradicate the sadness, of course, but I guarantee it will help.
Be proactive and develop a plan! Gather family, neighbors, relatives, co-workers, and friends, old and new, to help you stay connected and active.
You can pivot away from feeling the sadness that summer can bring to seeing this as the opportunity it truly is. It’s your chance to create a new, exciting, and golden summer that is perfect for the new you!!
Denise Palmer
